Common action: Prep a serious conversation by asking for their undivided attention, and then saying "never mind" or backing out. DON'T DO THIS...

If you don't know how to say what you need to say, let them know that by saying “I don’t know how to say this.” Then start talking. Do you think it will hurt their feelings? Prep them by letting them know that what you have to say may come off arrogant or disenchanting. Nervous? Say that. Express how you feel about what you're going to say first, so that what you actually have to say will be CLEAR when you say it. Train yourself to be brutally honest with you, and then have your brain transfer that honesty to your mouth...WITH SOME COMPASSION. (Our mouths can sometimes get us in trouble.)

After this, the person will respond however they respond. It's like rolling dice, you get what you get. Don't anticipate a response; rather be more concerned with if their response was authentic or if it was hiding something that they really wanted to say. But STILL LISTEN to what they are saying, DON’T listen to what you are saying in your head about what they are saying. Sometimes we listen for a certain response and then get thoroughly disappointed when we don't get what we want. Otherwise, telling them they're free to say what they want, and then jumping down their throat when they do.

Communication is a process, and you have to be willing to be as open and as vulnerable as you want them to be.

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